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Do You Think That You Can Keep Up With Me?

from The King of July 4th by Burger Stuffer Supreme

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lyrics

VERSE 1

I walked into the Burger Stuffer
For my midday meal
I ordered the Thrice-Fried Supreme
My normal combo deal

But as I took my order
Towards a table in the rear
I saw a lady, strong and bold
With a pile of food near

She unwrapped burger after burger
And downed onion rings and fries
The most seductive sight I’ve seen
In all my years alive

She saw me staring and licked the crumbs
From her ketchup red lip
She finished her whole tray of food
With consummate showmanship, and said

CHORUS

Do you think that you
Can keep up with me
Self-control is just a prison
And I live life to be free
Don’t ask me for my number
Don’t whisper something sweet
The only men I date are those
Who I cannot outeat

VERSE 2

I went back to the counter
And ordered five more meals
I took them to her table
And told her, “here’s the deal”

There’s one thing that I know for sure
No one eats like I do
So buckle in, lean back, relax,
And I’ll show you that it’s true”

CHORUS

Do you think that you
Can keep up with me
Self-control is just a prison
And I live life to be free
Don’t ask me for my number
I don’t think demure is neat
The only ladies that I date are those
I can’t outeat

CHORUS

Do you think that you
Can keep up with her and me
Self-control is just a prison
And we choose to live life free
Don’t ask to join our party
If your stomach can’t compete
The only people worth our time
Are those we can’t outeat

credits

from The King of July 4th, released June 29, 2018
Written, performed and (c) 2018 by Burger Stuffer Supreme and Odilon Green. Guest vocals by Mrs. Green.

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all rights reserved

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about

Burger Stuffer Supreme

I write songs about competitive eating. Because eating is fundamental.

I also write songs about beards for my band Opinionated Whiskers, linked below.

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